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Tuesday, May 7, 2013

I WANT TO BE THE "FROSTING"


Today, I came across this quote:

“Grandmas are moms with lots of frosting.” ~ Unknown 


I'm not sure if this quote is talking about the "frosted" hair...or all the wonderful things that grandmothers can get away with, when it comes to their grandchildren.  My boys would probably say this is talking about their grandmother allowing them to eat huge servings of chocolate cake for breakfast during one of their childhood visits.

Anyway...it made me think about grandparents...grandmothers, in particular.

I hardly knew my grandmothers...

Photo taken in the late 1950s to early 1960s

  My birth was a late in life one for my mom. And she was the youngest of 10. So my maternal grandmother was quite old during my early childhood. What I do remember was the smell of her home...The scent of olive oil warming on the stove. To this day, that smell brings her to mind. Sadly, this grandmother...the one with whom I had slight relationship...spoke very little English, and I was not yet fluent in Spanish.  Grandma DelValle was an immigrant...coming over to the US at the young age of 8. If she knew English, she had forgotten most of it during our time together. So...I really did not know her. And I was only 1 of tons of grandchildren. The eldest grandchild was already an "old man" when I came along....

   



My paternal grandmother was a tall, stern woman. I have only a few memories of her...and no photos. (She and my mother disliked each other, immensely.) The most vivid memory is of her telling me to get out of the drainage ditch water...because I might get worms. I was under 5 years when this took place. But I hear wonderful stories of Bama, from my sister. Sis talks about white gloves and pearls, hats and tea. How I wish I had those memories...




My boys did not really know their grandmothers, either. Other than the 1-2 visits a year, during their early years, my mom (94) did not see the guys, and she never talked with them on the phone. (Skype was not available then...but Mom would probably not have used it.) By the time we relocated to Florida...and lived less than 20 miles from Mom, she and Dad had retired and spent most of the years traveling or staying in the mountain house. While I don't fault them for enjoying their retirement, I am sad that my boys never got to see the crazy, fun side of my mother...of the lady who used to be the instigator of all things mischief, according to her siblings...of the lady who could warm your heart when she smiled. Today, although she is still living, dementia has taken such a strong hold on her mind. She tries, but does not remember the boys...or me.

My husband's mother saw the boys even less frequently than my mom... Gmac visited us once, when we lived in PA...after that trip, she was confined to the home due to her husband's health (MS). After his death, she refused to come visit...even with the offer of one of us accompanying her on the plane or driving her down to FL. She maintained that it took her 45 years to get out of FL, and that she would never return. So she even missed the weddings of two of our boys, and she has not seen her great-granddaughter. We've visited as much as possible, but the strong relationships were never there...And now, with her health concerns, it's difficult for her to be with "strangers".

Now, I am a grandmother....and I fully intend to be a part of the life of my granddaughter...and any future grandchildren I might have. I plan to learn from the mistakes of my parents and grandparents...and in-laws. I want to KNOW my sons, their wives, and their children. (so far, only one)

After all...who could resist this little munchkin...


I want to be the "FROSTING"

Here's some more quotes and wise sayings about Grandmothers...

"Grandmother-grandchild relationships are simple. Grandmas are short on criticism and long on love."  ~Anonymous

 "Nobody can do for little children what grandparents do.  Grandparents sort of sprinkle stardust over the lives of little children."  ~Alex Haley

"We should all have one person who knows how to bless us despite the evidence, Grandmother was that person to me."  ~Phyllis Theroux

"Becoming a grandmother is wonderful. One moment you're just a mother. The next you are all-wise and prehistoric."  ~Pam Brown

"Grandmas don't just say "that's nice" -- they reel back and roll their eyes and throw up their hands and smile. You get your money's worth out of grandmas."  


Grandma always made you feel she had been waiting to see just you all day and now the day was complete.
- Marcy DeMaree

Grandmothers are the people who take delight in hearing babies breathing into the telephone.
- Author Unknown

A grandmother is a little bit parent, a little bit teacher, and a little bit best friend.
- Author Unknown
If nothing is going well, call your grandmother.
- Italian Proverb

Celebrate your Gorgeous Grandma (and Grandpa) today!



4 comments:

jmac said...

Yep...this grandma thing is a pretty cool gig!!

Altho 4?? In 3 yrs??? really??

The Quintessential Magpie said...

Jane, you are the frosting, and your determination to be so will be felt by your grandchild and any future grandchildren. You would be the absolute best. I know it.

I never knew my paternal grandmother, but my father made sure I knew who she was along with his grandmother. My other grandmother was my heart. I was closer to her than I was to my mother, her daughter.

You are the Proverbs wife, and I guarantee your grandchildren along with your children will rise up and call you blessed.

XO,

Sheila

Anonymous said...

Perfect quotes and beautiful photographs.
Since my parents and I left Cuba when I was six, I grew up without grandparents, but I've looked into the eyes of many when they speak of their grandchildren, enough to recognize how special it can be. Enjoy every bit of it, frosting and all. :)
xoxo's

One Shabby Old House said...

I loved your post Jane. I pray that your grandchildren will know you so well that they will smell certain kitchen smells and remember you but I know that you will be so much more than that! No doubt in my mind that you will be FROSTING too!
Hugs
Becky